Put on Sinatra and Start to Cry.

OK, something that's been on my mind recently. It's a song. It came to me when I was listening to a jazz station on Pandora. The music got my attention. It started with subtle drumming. As the music played, it began to sound familiar. Eventually, the song segued into a melody which I remembered. I began to think of the house where I grew up. I thought of walking to the bus on a school morning.  It took a moment to place this melody. It was a jazz version of "On and On" by Stephen Bishop. The original version was an easy listening hit in 1977. The jazz version which got my attention is here. It's by the Jeff Hamilton Trio.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MgE9hJSDk1M

This melody took me back to my childhood. Took me back to the time when I was 11 years old. It reminded me of the time and place where my life was innocent and simple. Music can do that if you are willing to allow your self to get lost in it and go "there," to that nostalgic place. One must be vulnerable to this. The song made me wistful. It made me nostalgic for the eleven-year old me. 

Now, as an adult, I pay attention to the lyrics and their meaning. The second verse says...

Poor ol' Jimmy sits alone in the moonlight

He saw his woman kiss another man

So he takes a ladder, steals the stars from the sky

Puts on Sinatra and starts to cry

His feelings were hurt, so he puts on some music, in that case, Sinatra and he cries. I thought about all the times I have done this. The times I've had my heartbroken. The times I've had my feelings hurt, or had expectations which didn't get met. When I didn't get the job, I knew I deserved. I remember doing what Stephen Bishop says in this song. I sat in my sorrow. I sat in my bad feelings. I put on music that made me cry. Then as the song says, I found a way to move on. I got back up, and I started over again. The sorrow, the bad feelings, the depression, the heartbreak, it was all real. Hearing music that acknowledged that feeling helped me process the situation.

This kind of vulnerability is essential, especially for clowns. As clowns, we experience both laughter and tears. We experience the elation and the sorrow.

So, put on some Sinatra or Bill Withers, "Ain't No Sunshine When She's Gone."

or' Killing Me Softly With His Song,' by Roberta Flack and let the tears fall. 

Then move on….

On and on.